What day is it?

I don't know what I am feeling/thinking. Things have been going so well with no anxiety/panic attacks. Even today, one of those times where I would have given in/had a pity party/talked to a million people about it/wondered what people thought of my reactions. Meds are going good. Been on a low dose for quiet a while. Listening to my IPOD at night, (Don't ask Jenny about it b/c she says that she can't stand the woman's voice). I am not even listening to what she is saying, I know it by heart, it's just her soothing voice and the background music. Anyway, even while driving home today I could feel that anticipation of one coming on. But, why does one have to come on?? Why do I have them or stopped having them? Things are going good. Really good with work. Even with the car breaking down, me wishing for a date, things aren't bad at all. I am grateful. So, why don't I feel it?